August 2009
1 post
July 2009
5 posts
"...because the music that they constantly play,...
Today I trudged to work in the rain. I spent a total of eight hours in an office drowning in Broadway show merchandise, perusing social networking websites and harassing my boyfriend in an instant message. At noon, as I was deciding which trashy gossip site to visit next I was asked to deliver Cuban cigars to the heads of some fellow production companies. I handed off the last box to the last...
We're All the Same →
June 2009
17 posts
Lost in Translation
mbarrera101: Te extrano (I miss you)
"Jayme" : POLLO
mbarrera101: sigh
To be fair he doesn't really speak Spanish and the (I miss you) part was not included.
The Copy Room Gives Us Thrills
Co-Worker: Hows the internship going?
Me: Pretty good...can I scan this document while you print or will that mess up your print job?
Co-Worker: Sure. I just figured out the copy machine can do multiple jobs the other day.
Me: Cool
Co-Worker: Yeah it also prints and staples huge documents. You can print whole books out of this thing.
Me: ( a little too ethusiatically) Thats so cool!
Co-Worker: It's not THAT cool.
“If you’re anorexic I’ll just beat it out of you because I...”
– Madre (2005)
May 2009
15 posts
Just Another Day at Work Pt. 2
As I was walking home in the rain after a four hour shift handing out fliers in the human cess pool otherwise known as Times Square, I was almost crushed by two cars. The song playing on my iPod at this moment? “Will Never Marry” by Morrissey. The lyric he was singing? ” I will live as I will undoubtly die. Alone.” This was too good. I had to share.
Just Another Day At Work
I fell asleep on the sidewalk and was woken up by what may or may not have been a retarded cowboy. Oh New York.
Some Teachers Understand
This is from Twitter. I’m too computer retarded to figure how to take a screen shot so here’s the text.
one of my students (who’s graduating) submitted a paper w the title “FINAL UNDERGRADUATE PAPER FUCK YEAAA.doc”—i’m not inclined to demerit.
Hilarious.
IT IS CINCO DE MAYO
1. What did you get me?
2. My ancestors rock.
“Probably the sexiest woman I know is my mother. She’s an ethereal angel....”
– Shia LaBeouf
Someone didn’t get over their Oedipus complex.
Cyber Dog →
I know this kind of website setup usually involves what may or may not be a teenage girl and her web cam but just in case you don’t feel like watching Cindy…uh…tickle herself, I present you with an alternative: This awesome yorkie will preform tricks that are guaranteed to make you smile and perk up any bad day. Enjoy.
-MB
April 2009
16 posts
Headline of the Week: BOB SAGET NOT DEAD
Man: ...Bob Saget would roll over in his grave!
Woman: Oh my God! Is Bob Saget dead?
Man: No.
From Your Brain Straight to Twitter →
This is really fascinating and could potentially help millions of disabled individuals after it is further developed. The basic message here is that SCIENCE ROCKS.
“There is poetry…And then they say there are poets…poets of this...”
– Dr. Kheal by Maria Irene Fornes
Mysterious Rashes
I have one on my face. After confirming with 10 different doctors that it isn’t any of the following: herpes zoster ( SAY WHAT? Calm down, it’s the same as the chicken pox virus), small pox, an allergic reaction to a bug bite, an allergic reaction to sun exposure, an allergic reaction to ANYTHING, deadly, or contagious it turns out that THEY STILL DON’T KNOW WHAT IT IS.
FUCK YOU...
I was here before Oprah! →
BAINRS ARE AEWOMSE
You CAN read this:
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdgnieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the human mnid aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a word are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs...